The Pedigree people should not be allowed to make commercials ever. Why? Because they all make my cry. Between the "I know that I am a good dog" shelter dog commercials, and the new "We're for dogs" commercial, I've gotten teary over their commercials more than I have over my favorite teary movies.

Oh, and again, let me just say that you must watch Friday Night Lights. Seeing the kids on that show is like looking at teenagers I've worked with before. I've never seen teenagers (or marriage and family life) portrayed more realistically in any fictional media ever.

Watch it. All the back episodes are on nbc.com.

If you didn't watch the first season of Friday Night Lights, you have to. I rented in on recommendation of someone whose blog I read regularly (I don't link because there is some adult content). I just finished the first episode, and it was wonderful. The box set is inexpensive if you are the buying type (I think its only $20). It's really excellent, even if football isn't your thing.

This is my 600th post.

In the past 50.5 hours, I have gotten exactly 3 hours of sleep.

I love deadlines.

I finished a whole quilt. Granted, it is a baby quilt. And it is a flannel quilt, so it has no batting. But I did the whole thing by hand. And I'm pretty damned proud. I'm giving it to a coworker whose daughter just had his first grandchild. Here are some pictures.

On the last picture, you can kind of see the quilting. It's in a star pattern, right in the middle of the picture.

Just had to share this. Who would have thought that "Barbie Girl" sounded so good when played by four cellos? And who would have thought that some classical music major somewhere would have gotten bored enough to do the arrangement for four cellos?

I gave into temptation and spent $10 on two Ty Beanie Babies breast cancer awareness bears today. They are cute, pink, and a portion of the profits supports breast cancer research. My favorite aunt died from breast cancer, so I'm all for that.

I found mine at Walgreens, if you are looking for them. Of course, everyone has pink everything for sale this month, so I bet you can find them other places as well.

This article really makes you think. And it makes you wonder when people who are leaders of Christian denominations lost sight of what Jesus said and did.

So politics is on my mind right now. I guess it's 'cause our elections are rolling around soon (October 20 to be precise).



One of the big issues in both the governor's race and the state legislature race is whether or not to allow/require creationism/intelligent design to be taught in public schools. It has come up in every debate I've watched, listened to, or read about.



Personally, I believe in what I guess you could term intelligent design. I can't deny the science that evolution happened. There is hard, concrete, scientific proof of that. However, I can't deny that there was some kind of force, organization, direction guiding it along. I have no proof of that, except that I happen to not believe that such a complex series of events can happen by mere chance.



I believe, along with most Jews, Christians, and Muslims who believe in evolution, that that force is Yahweh/God/Allah, Father and Creator. God probably didn't manage the task in seven days, which contemporary biblical scholarship would agree with, but He (I'm using the male pronoun as a default because it's easier) did guide it along over millions of years. That belief doesn't invalidate the main point of the Creation stories in Genesis, that God created everything, and created it to be good (before humanity got a hold of it and mucked it all up).



Now having said that, I absolutely, positively, do not believe that creationism or intelligent design should be taught in any way, shape, or form in public schools. Contrary to what some conservative folk believe, this is not a Christian nation, and this is not a theocracy. There is a diversity of beliefs in this country, and we need to respect that. The schools should be teaching the facts; the parents who want their children to grow up with a certain belief about how the world was created should be teaching that, along with their respective faith groups, if that is applicable.



Now some would say, "I belive God created the world in seven days. Where is the respect for that?" It's respected in the same way every other belief is respected - by not being discussed and discredited by people who don't know what they are talking about. If we teach one religious belief about creation, we would end up having to teach them all. Not only is that confusing, but the discussion that would arise from people who are not comparative theologians (science teachers, in other words), would be lightweight at best, misinformed in the middle, and downright wrong at worst.

I don't even understand why this is an issue for discussion. Any legislation that would pass would end up going all the way to the Supreme Court, where it would be shot down anyway.

Sigh. My goal was to keep my blog non-political. I may not be able to do that through this election (not to mention the one to come next year).

Sigh.

Just in case you were wondering, Campbell's Selects Wedding Soup is not as good as Wedding Soup should be. The broth is bland and kind of greasy, and the spinach is gross. Oh, and the orzo is really mushy. The meatballs, however, are very tasty.

Every blogger I read regularly is either having a baby or sending a kid off to kindergarten or college. There has been talk on several blogs about going on college tours this fall. And by tours, I mean long trips out of state to see 15-20 different colleges.

Have things changed that much? When I was in high school, my parents agreed that I could go to all the roadshows I wanted in Pittsburgh, and that I could visit any school in Pittsburgh (because bus fare is cheap), and schools that were in-state, drivable, and did not require an overnight stay, and then only if I was serious about them. As a result, the only schools I visited outside of Pittsburgh were IUP (with a school group) Dickenson, St. Vincent, and Gannon, which was my ultimate choice.

(I must admit, though, that he also took me to see West Viriginia Wesleyan, mainly because they were offering me a full scholarship based on my grades through my junior year and my SAT scores. Even he admitted that wasn't everything, though, and that I could never live in a place that rural.)

Have things changed that much? Or was I just outside of the norm way back then? Granted, we didn't have a lot of money, and I'm sure that influenced how I approached the whole college search process. And most of the other kids in my class were in the same boat (inner city school and all). I thought only rich kids when and toured tons and tons of colleges, but most of the people I'm reading about are firmly middle-class.

I don't get it.

Ask Me Anything!

ETA on 9/26: Here is the answer to the first question!

ETA on 9/28: I made up my own question, and here it is!

I was going to provide you all with a random thoughts post, as I had many of those this weekend that seemed worthy of sharing. But I can't remember any of them now. See what happens when you pass 35?

So, friends, Romans, and random wanderers through the blogosphere, here is the opportunity you have been waiting for, even if you didn't know you have been waiting. Yes, it is your chance to...

Ask Me Anything!

Yes, you can ask me anything you'd like, be it animal, vegetable, or mineral; factual, fictional, or personal. I will answer just about anything with an answer that may or may not be true (I promise you will be able to tell the difference, though).

Haven't you always wanted to know what goes on in my groovy mind? Or haven't you always wanted to ask a complete stranger an off-the-wall question like, "What color were your favorite pajamas when you were four years old?" (For the record, they were white with blue roses, and very soft.) Here is your opportunity.

I will respond to any questions asked over the course of this week. I've given this post Friday's date so that it will stay at the top. Responses will be below it.

Bring it on, World Wide Web. Bring it on.

What Are Your Pet Peeves?

OK. No one actually answered this question, but I'm in a pet peeve kind of mood today.

• People who write or speak in the voice of their pets. Your pets are not people. They do not have human thoughts or emotions. They have doggy or kitty emotions, but not human ones. Stop trying to put thoughts into their little, animal minds.
• On a related note, people who refer to their pets as their children, or call themselves their pets' moms and dads or other family members. It is nauseating and creepy. Stop it.
• People who shop at Whole Foods because, "Organic is better for the environment, " then leave the store and drive away in their Hummer H2's. And yes, I see this all the time at the Whole Foods near where I live. They bill themselves as an environmentally friendly, crunchy granola kind of store, but the parking lot is filled with big-ass SUVs that get 5 miles to the gallon.
• And again, while we are on the subject, people who drive Mercedes, Lincoln, or other luxury SUVs. You want a luxury car, fine, but make it a car. You want an SUV, buy a Chevy or Ford or Toyota (or any other "normal" make).
• The fact that the bras I found that I like are always out of stock everywhere. People obviously like them, Bra Company, so make more of them.
• Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens...oh, wait...those are a few of my favorite things.
• The markup on electronics. I broke the charger for my cell phone. For the charger I wanted, the cell phone store charges $15, plus a fee to special order it (they only carry combo chargers - the ones that can be used in an electrical socket or a car. I just wanted an electrical charger). I found the exact same thing, brand name and all, on E-bay for $2.99, $8.50 with shipping. And it got to me in three days, as opposed the the 7-10 the phone store was saying.
• Boots.
• Frozen food containing carrots. Not everything needs to have orange in it to look appetizing.
• Martha Stewart and her hour-long commercial masquerading as a TV show (but I watch it every day anyway...sigh).
• Technophobic people working in state government.
• Hats.
• The fact that the more I learn about the candidate I originally planned to vote for (the real candidate, not the poet), the less I feel like I can, in good conscience, vote for him.
• Louisiana weather, and the fact that you can only comfortably wear sweaters four months out of the year.
• Ants.
• Frickin' student loans (though I have to say that the people who work for my servicer are always pleasant)
• The word "smirk" and, in particular, its misuse.
• People who don't seem to understand the difference between plurals and possessives
• Ads for feminine hygiene products
• The Airwick ads with the impliction of cross-species breeding (how does a giraffe end up with two boars as sons? And why are their voices so high if they are supposed to be teenagers?)
• The fact that the Albertson's with good produce has bad everything else, and the Albertson's with good everything else has bad produce.
• Busy streets in this city, with popular business on both sides, that are two lane and have no turning lane.
• The song, "Our God is an Awesome God." I used to not hate it quite so much, but when you hear it at mass every other Sunday for a year and a half, you get sick of it and realize that the lyrics are both kind of stupid, and that they portray God as wrathful, vengeful, and mean-spirited.
• In that same vein, most all happy, clappy, "the youth will love them!" worship songs. They lyrics are inane, and are often not in line with the theology of the churches that came out of the Catholic tradition (Roman Catholic, Orthodox, Lutheran, Anglican/Episcopalian are what I'm referring to here). The argument is that the kids don't get the good worship music. Let's give young people a little more credit here, can we?

I think that is plenty to be going on with.

Why Baton Rouge?

My first question! This one is from LutherPunk:

Ok, so why Baton Rouge? As a Lousiana native i understand that the call of
Tiger is great, but of all the places in the world a yankee girl could end up,
why there?

Why Baton Rouge? A question I have asked myself on more than one occassion since I arrived (when it took me a good hour to find the apartment building that is a mere 1.2 miles from the interstate exit - and it is a straight shot.). A question part of me is asking again as we in Louisiana endure another election cycle (they seem to happen every couple of months here).

I don't think I ever told the story of exactly how I ended up here in the first place. I shall share that fascinating tale with all of you now (Alert: you may want to have a Red Bull on hand).

In March on 2002, I found out that I would not be returning to the Catholic school where I had been teaching. It didn't come as a big shock to me on any level. First of all, there would be one less class in the middle school, and I wasn't certified to teach lower grades. Second, the principal at the time really preferred that all her teachers (with the exception of middle school math) be certified in Elementary Ed, rather than a secondary subject area. Third, I was a little too liberal, both politically and theologically speaking, to fit in with the culture of the school and parish. I would have stayed if they had asked, but I wasn't broken up that they didn't.

I decided that I didn't really want to be in teaching (though I didn't discount it all together). I enjoyed the day-to-day interaction with the kids, but sometimes the all-important (and inflexible) structure and rules really annoyed me. Add to that the fact that in middle school, I always ended up cleaning up the grammtical problem areas that the elementary school teachers should have taught but didn't (this is a universal problem, by the way. It's why so many school districts prefer secondary teachers in their middle schools rather than elementary teachers. Well, that and the fact that we know that adolescents are almost physically incapbably of walking single file and silent between classes - but that's another story). I sent resumes to a few schools (all out of state because it is almost impossible to get a teaching job - especially in English - in Pennsylvainia), but my heart wasn't in it.

A lot of people suggested that I consider youth ministry. I was already doing this in my parish (on a volunteer basis), I had a pretty strong theology and religious education background (both from classes I took in college and after, and my own reading), and I related really well with teenagers (probably because I never talk down to them). I did some research, found places with those kind of job listings, found some positions I qualified for, and applied.

The first call I got was from this church in Baton Rouge, Lousiana (note that this is the first time I am linking to my former employer. I will still call them St. Al's CCC, but I want those who are interested to have as full a picture of the parish as they can, rather than just my admittedly biased viewpoint). I had a phone interview with the whole staff (which was the largest staff I had ever heard of for a Catholic church - nine people not including the two priests - if you are interested, they are up to fourteen now, with one priest) which went extremely well. I also had interviews with churches in New Jersey, Maryland, and Idaho.

Well, all four churches offered me in-person interviews. The first one was the CCC. I flew in to New Orleans, was picked up at the airport by two members of the administrative staff, taken to lunch at a very nice restaurant (that I can't remember the name of), and dropped off at the hotel to rest for a while before dinner.

Dinner was at Mike Anderson's, a very good seafood place here (though I understand the quality has dropped recently). I had dinner with everyone on staff, and it was very nice. The next morning, I had a group interview with around 6 staff people and 3 or 4 parishoners. It went well. Then the director of religious ed and the director of liturgy took me to lunch and on a tour of the city. I saw Mike the Tiger, and I knew I could never live anywhere else.

Ok, I'm kidding about that last line. But seriously, the city really is rather nice for a small city (or what used to be a small city). I was struck even then by the dichotomy in the city, though. The neighborhood where the church is is very affluent, very well-educated, and very white. Literally across the street is a very poor, very black neighborhood of shotgun houses that have definitely seen better days. And then on the otherside of the that is a middle class neighborhood, which is right next to another affluent one. All of this is within about a mile radius of the church (but add in a neighborhood that is mostly apartments and college students, too).

Later that night, I went to dinner with two high school students who were really active in youth group and an adult (who would later come to be known as a minion of the dark one). That meal was at Chili's. I really had a good time and felt really comfortable. I was impressed with the young people, and impressed that the church involved the youth in the interview process.

I went on another in person interview (Maryland) and was all set to go to New Jersey and Idaho (God help me), but the CCC called me with a job offer. I did what you are supposed to do and didn't accept right away, and I talked it over with friends. I accepted anyway, without going on the other two interviews (Stupid, I know). I knew I didn't want the job in Maryland (it was right outside of DC, and way too...hectic for my tastes. The parish in New Jersey was right outside of NYC, and was probably very similar to the CCC. The one in Idaho was literally in the middle of nowhere (well, Twin Falls, so it might as well have been), and would have been way, way too rural for this city girl. Baton Rouge seemed ideal.

I accepted the job on June 30, and I was in Baton Rouge on July 15. Things went swimmingly for a while, but then I started to realize what I bad decision I made. That happend about...six weeks after I arrived and school started. I was told to spend that first year more in the background, and to let things go as they had been and to make observations and suggestions. Well, my first observation is that there was a distinct division between those who were in Catholic school (90% of the parish youth) and those who were in public or other private schools. I tried to point out that we needed to schedule not only for the Catholic school kids, but the other kids as well. I was told the public school kids didn't come to any events anyway, so why bother. I tried to point out that they didn't come because they were in religious ed at the time, or even in school at the time, and that maybe they would if we scheduled appropriately. Got shot down.

Pretty much every suggestion I made or program I tried to implement that year got shot down in some way, shape or form. At the end of the year, when I could finally take control of things, I spent weeks putting together a new structure that met the objectives laid out in official US Catholic Conference documents about effective, integrated, wholistic youth ministry (Renewing the Vision is the standard, by the way. And it is very good, regardless of the denomination). I gathered all the adults involved in any facet of youth ministry (jr. high, sr. high, religious ed., confirmation prep., etc) and presented this framework. Everyone was all excited about it, was on board, thought it was the greatest thing since sliced bread. Then somehow, when we had our first planning meeting, it morphed into something it totally wasn't supposed to be.

The problem is that the people in that parish are all used to being in charge. They are doctors, attorneys, college professors, business owners, and the like. The don't quite know how to step back and say, "tell me what I need to do." Instead, they tend to push ahead and say, " here is what we are going to do." And when many of them band together...well, I didn't stand a chance.

Then I found out on our summer leadership retreat that the minion of the dark one was organizing a campaign to have me fired. There had apparently already been one meeting with parish staff without me, and I resented that. A lot. I wasn't able to defend myself against anything that might have been said, and I had no idea what had been said. I was hurt that the senior members of the parish staff would sanction that. And I was hurt that the organizers didn't come to me first with their concerns.

Well, we had it out on that retreat. It was not the most professional thing I could have done, I admit, but I made sure that there were no youth present by having one of the seniors organize a game of Capture the Flag. I put all my cards on the table. I opened up, and I forced them to be honest (or so I thought). I had no idea the adults I had been working with for so long resented me so much. They didn't like that I had a more laid-back approach to youth ministry. They wanted everything to be heavy programming, heavy organization, every minute planned, etc. I can't function like that. I prefer to have a loose outline and follow where that naturally and organically goes. I'm just not "J" enough to function the other way.

We all agreed that we would give each other more time, and see how the year went.

Well, it went poorly. The minion of the dark one in particular (though she had a few lackeys who followed her every whim) pretty much made my existance unbearable. She instituted herself into every ministry we had for youth, even ones she never expressed an interest in. She was at every meeting I was in, and I swear I could have said, "The Catholic church believes in the doctrine of the Trinity," and she would have argued with me. It made me miserable and insecure. Add to that the fact that I didn't have the support of the senior staff (whose policy was always keep the most influential parishoners happy - they have money and a loud voice), and it was an almost unbearable situation.

The beauty of it is that this woman is now a spiritual director, trained by the Jesuits. And to think, I used to respect them.

Anyway, I came to the painful realization that that particular parish was not a good fit for me. I was also experiencing something of a dark night of the soul as I was coming to the conclusion that my beliefs didn't really fit Catholic theology all that well. I knew I was going to resign, but I was going to finish out the program year.

Didn't work out that way and I was fired two weeks before Confirmation. In fact, after a very painful chat with the pastor, I was given 10 minutes to take anything personal out of my office. They said that they would deliver the rest, which they left on my patio in a driving rainstorm, destroying the books they deigned to give back (they kept a lot of my personal books, as well as a bunch of CDs).

I was bitter for a long time, and probably still am a little. Some of that is starting to wane, though, as I see the direction that parish in general and that youth ministry in particular are heading. I'm probably a lot more sane (despite the stint on antidepressants) than I would have been. I haven't had to try to be someone I'm just not for the sake of keeping up appearances.

I had the opportunity to leave Baton Rouge a couple of times. I was offered teaching jobs in Connecticut and in Houston, but they just didn't feel right. Despite everything that went wrong with my last job, though, I'm glad I stayed. I wouldn't have my current, wonderful job if I hadn't.

And I like Baton Rouge, even if the politics, the racism and classism, and the lack of seasons do drive me nuts.

How's that for a long answer to a short question?

Remind me to never again buy a box of organic grape tomatoes because they were tw for $5 at Whole Foods, then to bring the whole box to work with me. Over the past two hours, I've eaten just about the whole thing, which is about 2 cups. Fortunately, tomatoes have only 27 calories per cup. Unfortunately, the have a ton of fiber, which I'm going to regret later.

I know. TMI.

Just to clarify on my post of a few days ago, I do believe that it is important to commemorate the 9/11 attacks, and Katrina/Rita. My frustration was with the fact that for days, or even weeks, leading up to the event, we were innundated with just stuff. And most of it wasn't new stuff, or discussion about current impacts. I'm all for that.

And PS, I absolutely agree that nationwide, people need to realize that the hurricanes impacted more than New Orleans, something most of Louisiana has a hard time with. They really hit some of the coastal parishes hard, especially Cameron and Calcasieu (which I probably misspelled), and Katrina hit costal Mississippi even harder than it did Louisiana. The reason you only hear about New Orleans is that A) it was the most major city hit (Biloxi was less than half it's size), and B) the government of our fair state has managed to screw up pretty much every thing it has touched as relates to the recovery efforts. I can't talk about a lot of what I know from the inside (since I'm loosely in the industry, and I like my job), but suffice it to say, a lot of the blame for the current condition of the state should be placed squarely at the feet of the resident of the Governor's mansion, who is currently in Spain to "drum up business for Lousiana." She has taken many such trips over her term in office, which, mercifully, comes to an end soon.

Speaking of which, I have an election rant, too. Our elections are coming up in November. We are electing Governor, Lt. Governor, a few statewide offices, and some state representatives and senators. All over town I'm seeing, "Vote Pro-Life" signs. Now, I have no objection to people placing those signs and encouraging others to vote that way. What I do have a problem with is the sillohuette of a fetus on the signs.

Being against abortion is not being pro-life. It is being anti-abortion. I bet if you surveyed these folks, they would agree that they are against abortion, euthanasia or assisted suicide, and stem-cell research, but they would tell you that they have no problem with the death penalty, with the torture of political prisoners or prisoners of war, with the lack of access to health care that so many in our state have (one estimate puts it at over 50% of working adults without health insurance), with the ridiculously low minimum wage, etc. All of those are Respect Life issues, too. If you are going to declare yourself to be pro-life, you better embrace all of what that means, hook, line, and sinker. Otherwise, just tell it like it is and say you are anti-abortion.

Sorry. This has been a pet peeve of mine for as long as I can remember, and every election year it gets my dander up.

By the way, I'm embracing my new goal to use as many cliches as possible in everyday life. Did I hit the nail on the head?

Yeah, this is no shocker.

This was my very favorite toy when I was a kid.

I got it second hand, and I played with it like crazy, until my parents insisted on giving it away to someone else (I guess 9 is too old to be playing with a toy clock).

I think I will have to save to buy one, though. I may even give it to someone with a kid.

I also had this.

And this.

And my neighbor had this, which I coveted.

Whatever happened to wood toys?

OK. I'm going to say something that may be controversial or unpopular. Just warning you in advance.

I don't understand why we have to have annual commemorations of tragic events with weeks worth of news stories, PBS programs, etc. leading up to them. I know the 9/11/01 attacks were a critical moment in American history. But they happened six years ago. Six isn't even an "important" anniversary. I could deal with the mention, and perhaps images of a memorial service, but story after story after story for days? Not so much.

I suppose part of it is that I live in a conservative, Republican, Southern state. "God loves America Best" is practically included in the 10 commandments around here (I think it takes the place of "Thou shalt not commit adultery" to see the Republican politicians around these parts. But I digress). And I think that the people who died in those attacks deserve to be remembered. I don't think, however, that I need a week's worth of stories on the evening news or articles in the so-called local newspaper about 9/11's affect on Louisiana (and sorry if it should be effect - I'm too tired to figure out the right one right now).

I feel the same way about Katrina/Rita. In addition to the two or three national PBS shows on the 2-year anniversary (again, a non-important one), there were about 5 local ones. That's a lot of Katrina. And the conclusions? The state is just as screwed up as it was two years ago. Gee. Anyone who lives here could tell you that.

I think I'm going to chuck it all, learn to drive the big rigs, and listen to nothing but The Statler Brothers and the Oakridge Boys on 8-track while I tool around the country.

Oh, and if you are a teacher, or know a teacher, go here for some laughs. Thanks to Blogger Blogs of Note for the link.

There are still 3.5 hours left in my day.

I may not survive the boredom.

That is all.

I did something I'm not entirely proud of today. I snuck out of church (yes, I made it...).

Oh, I didn't leave before the service was over, but I did intentionally sit in the back on the side aisle (as opposed to the center, where the pastor greets people as they leave), and as soon as the assisting minister finished the dismissal, I shot out the side door.

Why, you ask? Today was the young adult lunch, and I didn't want to go, but I didn't want to tell anyone why and I didn't want to lie.

Yeah, I know. Stupid, right? I just feel guilty about it nonetheless. The young adult group at our church has become very couple-centric and/or very, very young. The only other single people are undergrads. I'm 36 years old. I am almost old enough to be their parent. The couples are mostly younger, too - mid to late 20's. I just don't fit there.

But I don't really fit anywhere else, either. I am way, way to young for the ladies who make baby blankets (by about 40 years), I can't be active in any of the music ministries (due to the fact that I am tone deaf and have no rhythm), and I am way too young (and employed) to participate in the weekly Bible study, which is at 11 a.m. on Thursdays. That's pretty much the sum total of the what happens at my church, except for campus ministry, but that's a whole 'nother animal

I understand the reason for all this. Our membership literally spans five civil parishes (and actually, we have registered members in a couple others, but who drives 75 miles to go to church every week?). Nobody is wants to come into town for something that isn't on Sunday morning. But still, it's hard for me not to be involved in something.

Sigh. I'm not having a dark night of the soul, but I am having a bit of a dark night of the...body? Mind? I don't know.

So I heard on the radio today that Madeleine L'Engle died this week. I cried as I drove to the store.

A Wrinkle in Time is the first "grown-up" book I can remember reading. I was in 3rd or 4th grade I think, and allowed to use the middle school section of the school library because I had read everything in the elementary section by then. I have no idea why I picked that book, but once I started reading it, I couldn't put it down. When I found other books she wrote, much later (when I actually was in middle school), I read them as fast as I could. I think A Swiftly Tilting Planet blew me away even more than Wrinkle.

Ms. L'Engle is the reason I got interested in science and space (though even Meg Murray wasn't enough to make me overcome my hatred of math). She also got me interested in writing. When I imagined myself being a writer in my younger days, I always saw myself writing like her. My early attempts were almost all in the realm of science fiction and fantasy. They were also horrible. I learned that Ms. L'Engle's style is not my style, but she was my first inspiration.

Ms. L'Engle was also the first Christian writer I read who wrote about Christian themes without smacking you over the head with those ideas. She taught me that subtle is good.

I really don't quite know what to say beyond this. She was my favorite writer, one of my favorite "famous" people. I really feel this loss, yet I know she is a far better place.

So I will just say thanks, and I will say:

BE!

This guy is running for governor of Louisiana.

I think he shall get my vote.

Go read this article about a school for special needs kids in Massachusetts.

I didn't think places like this still existed, and I'm embarrassed that they do.

And I read Walden II in high school, and it creeped me out.

That is all...

So, I never quite made it out of my jammies today. Yes, that means I missed church again. I couldn't sleep last night, so when I finally got to sleep, I slept until 1. On the plus side, I did about $20 worth of laundry last night. That isn't as impressive as it sounds. Our washers are small, and cost $1.25 for a wash. The dryers are $1.25 as well, and one of them didn't work. I can't figure it out. The laundry I put in there wasn't heavy, and it was warm when I went to take it out, but it was still soaking wet. I also put quarters in a dryer that had no clothes in it, instead of the one I put my clothes in, and didn't discover it until I went to get the clothes out of the dryer.

You know what I wish? I wish my church had some kind of adult education thing that wasn't on Sunday morning. The adult forum on Sundays is really, really bland, and full of old people. I would volunteer to lead something ('cause I kind of miss being involved in ministry, too), but I'm still a little gunshy first of all, and second, I'm afraid I'm not knowledgeable enough in my new denomination. Yes, I know I am being stupid. Nevertheless, I'm still scared.

Oh, and I'm looking for something to enhance my own prayer life, which is kind of stagnant right now. I'd like something that involves Scripture, but not the liturgy of the hours. I've never been able to handle that. Any suggestions?

Last thing. I've been thinking for awhile about volunteering with CASA (Court Appointed Special Advocates). Basically, CASA volunteers stand up for children in the child welfare system, advocating for stable placement, educational resources, etc. I've been thinking about it for a long time, but I'm always afraid it will interfere with work. I think my current job may be flexible enough to allow for it, but I guess I should talk with my boss before I find out more.

All right. I'm going back to some sewing. I have to labor tomorrow on Labor Day, but only for a few hours. Those of you who have the day off, enjoy.

I just got a ding on my credit report from a collections agency that claims I have an outstanding Verizon bill from a phone number in Hackensack, NJ. I have never even been to NJ, let alone lived in Hackensack long enough to have a phone number there.

Either they are confused or sleazy, or Verizon is confused or sleazy. Either way, it has produced a 20 point hit on my credit score.

In reading an article about how CBS has declined to allow Big Brother ejectees to be interviewed by the media until after the finale (now that the really controversial houseguests are starting to be evicted) and another article about how the people who watch the live feeds and the uncensored Showtime footage this season are really watching a different show than the one CBS views are seeing, I found this update about what is happening in the lives of Dr. Will and Mike Boogie.

TG, don't read this in the presence of your girls, or at work if you are not in your own office (there are no graphic images if you don't click the Youtube video, but there are graphic words).

Here is part 3. I like this series because she didn't try too hard to make Harry Potter too allegorical. She just saw certain biblical things that the text went with and rolled with them.

Part 2 of the sermon series mentioned in the previous post.

OK. I have to share this entry too, from the same blogger as the last. It helps if you know something about Harry Potter, but the sermon is powerful, even if you don't. I got chills when I read it (not scared chills, but "hey, this is talking to me!" chills), and almost cried a little (I'm at work, though, so I managed to hold back). And the Scripture reading it is based on is one of my favorites.

Just wanted to share this post from a blog I read occassionally. Nothing like the fire of the Spirit.

Oh, and I just wanted to say that whoever is giving Amber on Big Brother messages and visions of her winning this thing is pretty sneaky to disguise him/her/itself as God. Otherwise, I would have to say God has a terribly cruel sense of humor, and I can't believe that.

But I also have to say that I admire Amber's self-confidence (or self-delusion) in believing that she has the face/body/attitude to be a professional model. I will also feel bad for her when the cruel realities of the world of modeling come crashing down around her.

Sharing This 'Cause it Makes Me Laugh...

If I ever again say anything about looking at St. Al's CCC* youth ministry website, please be sure to smack me.

It frustrates me that they are now doing everything I tried to do when I was there and was told I couldn't. And it isn't even as if there has been a change in pastor or administration. It's just that I was a poor, northern girl, and the guy running it now is a wealthy, southern boy who grew up in the parish.

I have to say, though, that the theology they are imparting isn't really that good. It is basically conservative Catholocism mixed with the Southern Baptist, "Yay God! Accept Jesus into your life and you will be rewarded!" kind of feel. I never thought the powers that be at the CCC would allow that, but it just goes to show what I know.

I often think about becoming more involved in ministry in some way, shape or form at my current church, but I admit that my experiences at the CCC have made me a little gunshy. I'm even leery of volunteering to read scripture on Sundays, something I've been doing since I was in middle school.

Sigh. Being part of a Christian community shouldn't be this hard.

This is an interesting article about children with reading difficulties. And it is absolutely true.

I wonder if anybody has ever researched whether or not the same is true for math. Logicially, it seems like it would be. And it would explain a lot in my own life.

I could count to a hundred before I started preschool, but I had trouble writing numbers. Then in first grade, I had trouble learning basic facts. By second grade, when I had to deal with multiplication and adding/subtracting multiple columns, I was lost. I struggled with math all the way through to fifth grade, when a fantastic teacher (Mrs. Mikush - I hope you Google your name and find this!), helped me figure out how to manage things. Even after that, though, I had to struggle with the basics. I understood the concepts, but I couldn't execute the actual work.

By the way, if you complain to Dannon that it is stupid that they put high fructose corn syrup into your favorite yogurt, they will send you coupons for free packages of said yogurt. Of course, they will continue to put the high fructose corn syrup in your yogurt, but at least the chemically altered sugar is free.

Oh, and if you go to this site you can get a free chicken sandwich and coke from Chik-Fil-A. It will take 6-8 weeks to get it, but nonetheless.

Kinda slow at work again.

Here is a good argument for school uniforms.

Personally, I was glad when we started wearing uniforms when I was in 7th grade. We didn't have a lot of money for school clothes, and I wore hand-me-downs and thrift-store specials, mostly. I got teased a lot. Then when I started going to public high school, it happened all over again.

Here, almost all students in all schools - public and private - wear uniforms. Khaki pants, shorts, and skirts, mostly, and polo shirts, and I think that's a good thing. It's less expensive for the parents, and the charities that help with uniforms and schools supplies can buy them cheap in bulk.

Just my two cents...

Here is a question for TG (and anyone else who may be interested).

Am I going to burn in hell forever because I find Amber on Big Brother's "praying" and her messages from God absolutely hilarious?

And if I am, will it be worth it?

I did something colossally stupid. When I was paying bills last week, I was writing out checks for partial payments for my surgery. I meant to write a check for $25 for one of the providers. Wht did I do instead? I wrote a check for $186, the total amount I still owed them. Did I put $186 in my checkbook register? No. Did I overdraw my account? Yep. Big time.

Sigh. Well, at least they are paid off now. It's going to take me more than a month to catch that up, but what are you going to do?

I just discovered that my gynecologist runs the rape crisis center in Baton Rouge. That explains a lot about his stirrup-side manner. Most men suck at that (though, admittedly, I only had one other before this guy). He's actually pretty good at not making me uncomfortable. And if he can do that for me, he can do it for anyone.

I have cramps. And the government is stupid. And it is hot. And I am tired. And I am cranky. And the government is stupid. And my sunburn hurts.

But I have my car back. It nearly overheated this morning, but it is back.

I do not like the Post-Gazette's new format. I rely on them for the AP feed, as the website of the paper down here refuses to acknowledge that there is a world outside of Louisiana. Where is the AP feed?

Post-Gazette, if you have somebody do blog searches for negative comments like the computer company that rhymes with Hell does, the new format sucks. It takes too long to load, it isn't easy to navigate, and the AP feeds are gone, despite having markers for them at the bottom of the page.

Fix it.

Your Score: A Bit Of Both

You are 50% Calvin and 50% Hobbes

Calvin & Hobbes, like a scruffy yin and yang, are in perfect balance within you. Like Calvin, you're weird, a bit insecure, and can be a trouble-maker. But like Hobbes, you're down to earth and sensitive. It's a risk to say it here, after just a ten question test, but I'll bet you're smarter than most. Both Calvin and Hobbes are crafty, clever characters, and any one made from equal parts of each is a force to be reckoned with.

Link: The Calvin Or Hobbes Test written by gwendolynbooks on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test

I miss Calvin and Hobbes. This was my favorite comic for as long as it was in publication. The best part about living in the Kirk House in college was all the Calvin and Hobbes (and Far Side) comic books in the magazine rack.

Oh, and remember world:

I am a force to be reckoned with!

My Day

by Sheryl


My Sunday started out to be a very promising day. I was up before 8, so I had time to do some laundry before church. I went over to the laundry room and found it to be absolutely foul. A couple of the washers leaked again, people threw lint on the floor in the water to make a linty, icky mess, and some cretin stubbed his cigarret out in the change slot of one of the washers. Still, though, I managed to find a couple washers and loaded my laundry. Well, when I went over to put my clothes in the dryer, the coin slot jammed on one of the dryers. I had to put two loads of laundry into one dryer, since there was only that one other open. My laundry didn't quite get dry enough, and it is currently spread out on the living room floor.

So then I go to get in the shower, something I do at least once a day, every day. You would think that by now I would have mastered the art of climbing into the tub. You would think wrong. The side of my tub is really high, like above my knee high (the bottom of the tub is elevated about 8 inches off the ground). I missed getting my foot all the way over the side, and smacked it into the edge of the tub instead. It hurt, but it wasn't until I tried to move it and realized that that hurts a whole, awful lot that I realized that I probably broke my toe (if I'm lucky - HA!) or my foot (if I'm not - which when you read the rest of the story you will realize that is probably my fate). Still, I've broken toes and feet before, and I'm OK with that - not much you can do about it, anyway.

Well, I get dressed and leave for church, leaving my cell phone behind (remember that, as it is a key part of the story). I get out on the road and realize that my ball joints sound really, really bad now, so I decide to skip church and take my car to the car fixing place instead. Well, just as I got to the place where I turn on to the street where the car fixing place and my office are, I felt a huge thump and the right side of my car dropped and started smoking. I managed to get into the parking lot shared by a pizza place and Taco Bell.

A guy standing at a bus stop tried to help me change the tire (at this point, that was all that appeared to be the problem). He tried to loosen my lug nuts, but they were on too tight and ended up stripping my lug nut loosening thing (I'm all about the technical terms today). So I thanked him for trying to help me, then went to Taco Bell to ask for a phone book and to use the phone. It was probably about 11:20 at this point. They wouldn't let me use the phone, but they would call someone for me. I gave her my boss's number, because I had to work today (that's where I am now), but there was no answer. I didn't have my cell phone, so I had no one else's number (I had to look his number up). So I looked up a few other numbers, but rather than have the counter person there do my bidding all afternoon, I went to the pay phone at Albertson's, which is in the same parking lot. Keep in mind that it is about 95 degrees and I am dressed in church clothes (fortunately, I brought my tennis shoes with me, because the only pair of sandals I could find this morning hurt my feet). I called my boss's office phone and left him a message, then I tried to call a co-worker who I knew was in the office, but I couldn't remember his extension. Finally, I called this emergency assistance place here. They do simple stuff like unlocking cars (remember that), jumping batteries, and changing tires. Well, that guy got there fairly quickly, but he couldn't loosen the lugs either (and honestly, didn't try that hard) and told me I had to call a tow company.

By this point, I'm pretty much drenched in sweat, but I went back to Taco bell to use their phone book again. A couple was in the restaurant heard me telling the counter person about my plight, and he offered to try to change the tire for me. I told him what the RA guy said, and said I was just going to call a tow truck. They left while I was looking up numbers, but then the wife came back in and said that her husband wanted to take a crack at the wheel anyway. I agreed (because, really, who wouldn't if they could save $86 bucks on the 3/4 mile trip to the car fixing place). He pulled two different lug wrenches out of his trunk, and with a combination of willpower, weight, and skill, he managed to loosen the bolts (I had to stand on one end of the lug wrench to do it.). He changed the tire, and I thought all was well.

The couple's names were Alfred and Coretta, and I'd appreciate it if those of you who are of a praying persuasion that God that they were there for me today, and pray for Alfred's continued recovery from a stroke he suffered a few months ago.

Well, I got in the car, started it up, and put it in gear. I made it about two feet before the wheel fell off. Yeah, the ball joint totally broke. So now I had to call a tow truck. So I walked back to Albertson's, called the first number on my list (thank God I had some laundry money left), and she told me that they were really busy, and she couldn't even dispatch a truck for at least an hour. I called the other two numbers, and got no answer, despite the fact that they advertised 24-hour towing. I'm in tears at this point, and called my boss's work phone and sobbed into his voicemail. Then I went into Albertson's and used their phone book to get the number of the car fixing place to find out if they had a towing company they frequently used. They did, and I called them and sobbed to the lady on the phone. She said that she would get a truck out as soon as possible. That's when it started to rain.

So I walked through the parking lot in the rain back to my car, where I discovered...I locked my keys in the car. At this point, I wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry, so I did a little of both. I went into Taco Bell and ordered a Pepsi so I could sit in the restaurant while I waited for the tow truck. As I went into the restaurant, I passed a mother and her son waiting for the rain to stop for them to get to the car, and the little boy asked his mother, "Mama, what's wrong with that lady?" Yeah, I was looking rough at that point.

Well, the tow truck arrived and I informed the driver that I had a slight problem. He did not have any lock-out stuff with him, but he suggested I go and ask the pizza place if they had a hanger so that we could maybe unlock the door through a slightly open window. The did, and we worked on it for about 25 minutes...until the hanger broke. So then I had to call the roadside assistance people again, and the same guy came. He said to me, "You aren't having a good day, are you?" I wanted to smack him.

By this point, I'm drenched with sweat, dehydrated, and miserable. Keep in mind I still have to work, and that I haven't been able to find anyone to give me a ride to work. The tow truck guy said he take me to my office after we dropped off my car. That was nice of him.

When we got to the car fixing place, my boss showed up just about a minute or two later. I wanted to cry with relief. Then I went into work and worked 9 hours on a proposal that was supposed to be due tomorrow and has now been extended until Friday.





Most of the above was written yesterday, but I didn't have the stamina to finish it until today. The previous post tells you how things stand right now.


Sigh.

OK, Blogosphere. It's time for another round of Run Sheryl's Life.

Here is the situation. My car is broken (watch for the post about the whole, sad affair later). It will cost about $700 to fix. It is 10 years old and has 152,000 miles on it. The Blue Book Value is $852.

I got in touch with a car dealership, and they were apparently able to work out financing for me. I don't know the details yet, but I do know what payment I can afford easily, and I know how much my insurance would go up buying full-coverage insurance. I can afford a note, but it scares me nonetheless, and my world will be considerably less comfortable, especially if I need to find a new apartment in December (because my rent will increase by about $150 a month for any place that isn't scary).

So, what should I do? Should I repair the car (keeping in mind that I may need to get another, similar repair relatively soon)? Should I wait to make a decision after I talk to the dealer? Should I just give up and to figure out the insane public transportation in Baton Rouge?

It's times like this that I wish my dad were still around.

Life sucks. That's all I have to say right now. I will say more later, though.

So True

You Are Scooter

Brainy and knowledgable, you are the perfect sidekick. You're always willing to lend a helping hand. In any big event or party, you're the one who keeps things going. "15 seconds to showtime!"

The Muppet Personality Test

If you don't believe in the importance of proofreading, perhaps this will change your mind...

So I've been thinking about cars lately. Mostly because the time has come where I absolutely must get mine fixed, or I must get a new car. I'm almost afraid to drive it in it's current state (I need new ball joints and control arms - which are apparently attached on my car, or I'd only need the ball joints). If my building manager will let me pay my rent a week late (with attendant late fees, of course), I can get it fixed at the end of the month thanks to the buttload of overtime I'm about to have. I really am afraid to wait much longer than that.

 

But I've been contemplating looking for something new, or new-used. I really can't afford a car payment right at this moment (at least not if I want to keep up the same pace I am with my other debts), but it might be better to think about a car that wasn't going to nickle-and-dime me over the next year until I can afford a car payment. After all, my car is 10 years old and has 151K on it. In addition to the ball joints, I need a belt, a thermostat, and an air conditioning compressor.

 

So I've been looking mainly at the Toyota Yaris, the Honda Fit, and the Chevy Aveo. They are all reasonably priced, all are small but not cramped, and all get good mileage. They all have their own drawbacks, however, the most prominent being that almost no features are standard - including AC. Living in Louisiana without AC in your car is a Very Bad Idea, but to get AC, you have to get a whole bunch of other things you don't want or need, like an mp3 player adapter (I don't have an mp3 player, and I only listen to NPR in the car anyway).

 

The other thing that bothers me is that a lot of cars have the spedometer mounted in the middle of the dash (between the driver and the passenger) instead of behind the steering wheel where it belongs. You have to take you eyes off the road a lot longer to look at spedometer over there than you do if it is right in front of you.

 

I'm also looking at used cars, and if I go that route, I'd like either a Camry or a Corrola. The only problem is that people who buy those cars hold on to them for so long that by the time they come on the used market, they aren't much good.

 

Any other suggestions out there? I'm looking for a relatively small car, that gets good mileage but isn't a hybrid, that is reliable, and that won't break me financially.

Supposedly, this is what I would look like on the Simpsons. Eh. Maybe. The hair and eyes are pretty spot on, at least.

Just Thought I'd Tell You...

…that my body has craptastic timing. That is all.

Work in Progress

Need to iron out a few bugs (like how to get the green corners to go away and how to get the icons to not be green anymore), but I kind of like it.

The sunset picture is from Lake Erie at Presque Isle State Park in Pennsylvania, by the way.

Just call me that guy who paints the geometric paintings (who I am too lazy to go look up).

I am ravenously hungry today, and I have no idea why.

 

I blame the heat.

 

Though I suppose the fact that "that time of the month" is soon to arrive can be blamed as well.

 

I'm still bored. I may grace you all with more of my wonderful artwork later on today.

It's 6:17 p.m. The sun is starting to go down...and it's 102 degrees.

Um...God? Not to be disrespectful or anything...but...WTF?????

Told you I was bored.

Just to continue my efforts to spam my own blog today (and because I am bored at work - holding pattern again), here is a cute picture of some goats. This came from the Post-Gazette, via AP Photographer Joe Gill

This is what I do for a living:

This is what I do for a living:

http://www.comics.com/webmail/ViewStrip?key=55705651-fba04e1509-FF

Just in case you were wondering...

So, I hate the heat and I hate grocery shopping. So what do I do on the hottest day of the year in Baton Rouge? I go grocery shopping, of course. (It was actually a degree hotter yesterday - 104, but 103 is almost as bad).

So I went to the Albertson's that is usually the good Albertson's, in other words the one not close to my house. They have peaches on sale this week for $0.99 a pound. Peaches are my favorite fruit, except for cherries (which I apparently can't eat anymore because I discovered that they do incredibly nasty things to my digestive system - but that's another story). The peaches at the good Albertson's were horrible compared to the ones at the close Albertson's, so I had to settle for nectarines. Not nearly as satisfying.

Then I was going to get a couple pieces of fried chicken for dinner. I don't indulge in it often, but I've been craving it. Well, it smelled like they had some, but when I got into the store, the case was empty. The deli lady had cleaned it out. It wasn't even 6 p.m. yet. They usually have chicken until at least 7.

And just to top things off, they were out of the yogurt I like. The only good thing was that Stouffer's frozen things were on big sale.

So I finished my shopping and did the checkout thing. I left the store, and could see from the exit that someone was kind enough to leave their cart right behind my car after they loaded their groceries. If you don't feel like taking your cart the whole 10 feet to the cart return, fine, but have the courtesy to not block someone else in.

Well, I get to my car and go to put my groceries in the trunk. Wouldn't you know, one of my bags broke and a container of cranberry juice fell out. Of course, it didn't make it the whole six inches from the cart to the trunk, where it wouldn't have broken. No, it fell on the concrete and broke open. I suppose I could have gone into the store and complained and gotten a new bottle, but it was hot and I was tired, so I didn't bother.

So now I had two carts to take to the cart return. Could I get the one of the carts to slide into the other? Of course not. So I had to struggle with two carts, while at least two people (one of them a store employee) watched me. When I got back to the car, I walked through the cranberry juice, which made the bottom of my shoes slippery, which made me slip on the blacktop when getting into the car which made me bruise my butt.

Oh, and when I left for church this morning (yes, I made it, and I'll write about it tomorrow, maybe), I discovered that a flock of diarrhetic birds who I though had left didn't really leave, and apparently decided to rest in the tree above where I parked last night. My car got soaked in bird crap for the third time in the past 10 days. And the really sad thing is that on the days when I didn't park under the tree, nobody's car got crapped on. When I did park under the tree, my car was the only one that they chose to target.

Yeah, I'm cranky a little. I wish it were December so we'd finally see daytime highs below 80.

How come stuff I need to buy is always on sale when I have no money with which to buy it?

TG: you are absolutely right about last night's TWOP recap. I missed the episode (stuck at work), but I don't feel like I missed much at all.

Dude! Martha Stewart just changed my life.


She was interviewing that guy from Project Runway (which I've only seen once because I don't have cable). She said at one point that we are all concerned with clothes because we all where them every day.


We do??? That's why people have been looking at me funny!

You learn somehting new every day!

Really, Pittsburgh? Just, really? You couldn't come up with anything better than Steely McBeam? And why do the Steelers need a mascot anyway? They've managed 75 years without one.

Methinks there will be a cermonial funeral for Ol' Steely sometime ths season.

Much better than the actual show are Television Without Pity's recaps of Big Brother. You simply must read them.

I'm not a big fan of Sinead O'Connor, but I'm almost tempted to buy this album. It sounds interesting to me for some reason. I kind of want to see what she did with the theme. At the same time, I'm not sure I want to spend money on her. Hmm. Decisions, decisions...

I'm having a bit of summer malaise. It is hot. Really hot. And humid. Like, the air feels heavy against your body humid. It's hard to care about much.

I missed church, again. I could have made it this week, easily. But I didn't. It's hard to make it to my church in the summer. A good bit of the congregation disappears, even the ones not attached to LSU. It is a chore to worship there in the summer.

I know it shouldn't matter, but I don't like it when worship feels like penance. And it isn't like the people who are there are any different (except we all look like we may die in the heat. Midwesterners of northern European descent aren't built for Louisiana summers). The pastor isn't any different, and the quality of his sermons doesn't decline. We have no choir, but for musically impaired me, that isn't that big of a deal.

I guess that leaves me. I guess I'm going through another spiritual dry spell. They have been coming more frequently since the CCC. I've never been able to get back to that point where I knew God as more than a distant creator.

You know what, that isn't exactly true. It would be more correct to say that my experience of God has changed a lot since then. I don't know if I can quanitfy what that change is, though.

I think I need a retreat. Or a spiritual director. Or something. Any suggestions?

Can I just announce that I just got a 10% raise? Can I also announce that I've never gotten a raise of more than 2% without a change in job title? Can I also say that I absolutely love my company?

I have never been this financially secure in my life. Hell, I have never been financially secure in my life.

I don't quite know what to do with this.

But it will make it a whole lot easier to finally get my car fixed so that my wheels won't fall off.

Want your disturbing images of the day? Click here. Make sure you click through all the sample pages, in order to take in the horror.

Oh, and the movie I went to on Sunday cost me $14.50 for a matinee ticket, small popcorn, and medium Coke. It would have been more if I had gotten water, which is what I really wanted. A 20 oz bottle of Dasani or Aquafina (aren't the interchangeable?) costs $4. I can get a gallon of super premium bottled water at Whole Foods for that much.

 

Talk about markup.

If I have to spend another day at work the way I've spent the past 7 or so, I may have to gouge out my eyes with whatever dull implement I can find just to spark some excitement.

Things are slow. Really slow. We had a slow period like this once last year, but it didn't seem as bad because there weren't as many people.

And it's quiet. Nobody in my shared office is talking. And I can't work on some of my own stuff because I haven't uploaded my latest revisions to Google Docs yet.

Somebody save me!

So I've finished skimming Deathly Hallows. Skimming, mind, not in-depth reading. It isn't as bad as I feared. In fact, if I put myself in the shoes of a 16 year old, it's pretty good. I'll wait until next week to post more details, since Blogger doesn't let you cut like Live Journal does.

In other news, it's been a long time since I told you people about my underwear. So I needed some new underpants this weekend, and I thought that since I was at WalMart to buy DH, I'd get underwear while I was there. Yes, I buy cheap underpants. Why should I spend lots of money on underpants when I am the only one who sees them? Well, they were out of the cut I like (high-cut, if you are interested), so I said to myself, "Let's be daring!" and I bought a package of boy briefs.

On the one hand, I like the fact that the legs don't have elastic, which gets really uncomfortable when you sweat, which is pretty much constant here from March through October. Also, the fabric is soft, which is nice.

The downside is that they are 100% cotton, which is semi-good when it is hot because it wicks away sweat, but it is also semi-bad because they stretch. A lot. A little spandex would be a good thing.

Oh, and I saw Ratatouille today. It was really good. In terms of animation, it was probably Pixar's best. In terms of story, I still give the edge to Finding Nemo. Did I ever mention that the CCC stole that DVD from me? No? Well, they did. Of all the AV stuff (some videos, lots of CDs, a few other DVDs) they didn't return, that is the one that I regret the most.

OK, I really need to sleep now. Have a lovely Monday.

I kid I went to high school with is in the obituaries today. He is the sixth one in my broad circle of friends (in other words, people I associated with in school, but not really outside) to die, and the fifth one in which alcohol played a role.

This kid was brilliant. From talking to people who went to middle school with him, he was probably the brightest kid in our class. However, he has been drinking since he was 12, and by the time he got to high school, he was a serious alcoholic. He was driving drunk.

You know, I see people from my high school still posting about partying, and posting pictures of themselves at nightclubs and bars on myspace and alumni sites, and I don't understand it. Not that I don't go out occassionally, but I'm 36 years old, as are these people. I don't feel the need to act like I'm 23. The focus of my life is not what bar I'm going to go to on Friday night and how wasted I'm going to get.

It makes me sad to see this. I know I've said it before, but I'll say it again.

These were not stupid people. Yet they seem to be stunted at the age of 19. What happened that I got beyond that point and they didn't.

Granted, I went away to school, and none of them did. I had to deal with total adult responsibility sooner than they did, as a result of losing both parents by the time I was 24. But surely that can't be all.

Though it is funny to note that all the people I see doing and saying things about drinking and partying now are all people who never left the neighborhood we grew up in. The ones who left, even just to another part of the city or a nearby suburb, seem to be normal, responsible adults. Why the difference?

If I were pursing a graduate degree in sociology, I'd smell a thesis or dissertation there. But I'm not, and it just makes me sad.

This makes me happy.

Bishop Zubik is a very good man and a very good bishop. He does a kick-ass Confirmation Mass, too.

Well.

Apparently there is an entire leaked copy of Deathly Hallows on the internet somewhere. Now, I don't go looking for spoilers (so I haven't read what's there - except for the epilogue (which was disappointing, to say the least), but some folks at some of the blogs I read do. Several of them have read the whole thing. And some folks who's opinions I really trust were really disappointed. And from the spoilers I've encountered, I think I will be to. The general consensus is that it seems like JKR kind of got bored with the series, and committed character assassination before the real deaths happened.

That makes me sad.

But in a way, I almost understand it.

Seven books with the same characters is a lot. Think about it. We're talking over 2000 pages - close to 3000. I can't imagine that. Of course there is going to be some decline in quality.

But in the last book? That makes me sad.

Nevertheless, I will be spending my Saturday reading the actual thing. I'll post my reactions when I do.

Maybe if this book sucks, it will kick my butt into getting back into the Greater American Novel.

So, I haven't posted much this week. Not that I haven't had blog-worthy thoughts, just that most of my blog-worthy thoughts this week have been about politics and religion, two things I try to avoid writing about.

Well, let me clarify that. I'll write about religion (or more correctly faith and/or spirituality) as it relates directly to me, or to something I've learned. I don't like writing about global religion issues for several reasons. First of all, I am afraid that I'm not knowledgeable enough to comment...well...knowledgeably. I'm still learning about this new denomination I've embraced, and I'm uncomfortable commenting on the issues facing it without having been in it for more than a few years. And I try not to comment on stuff that comes out as it relates to Roman Catholicism because I don't want any sour grapes I may still harbor to color my perception.

Politics, on the other hand, I really try to avoid. The reason for that is that I know my readership runs the political spectrum from very conservative to very liberal. And as far as I am concerned, they are entitled to fall wherever they choose to fall along that spectrum, just as I am. I avoid discussing my opinions on politics because I don't want to offend anyone, or lose the respect of people who knew me way back when, before I became a bleeding-heart liberal.

But today, I am going to suspend my rule and discuss both topics together. More specifically, I'm going to say that I think the two topics should be completely divorced from each other.

I was reading some of the testimony of Dr. Richard Carmona this weekend (and my apologies if I spelled his last name wrong). He is the former surgeon general, and he testified to congress about how he was instructed by the White House to supress certain scientific information in his speeches, briefings, and publications, information that specifically relates to such topics as stem-cell research, abortion, contraception, and other hot-button issues on the Evangelical/fundamentalist platform. That offends me as an educated person.

I'm not going to say that the Republican party as a whole holds these opinions, but there is a certain, large segment that would like to see religion (evangelical Chrisitanity specifically) entertwined into the government of this country. That isn't acceptable. It isn't even the separation of church and state issue, or even the freedom of religion issue that makes it unacceptable.

The fact of the matter is that it is unacceptable because tying up religion with politics - conservative or liberal - denies the diversity of this country, and the diverse viewpoints of its citizens.

Now, individual politicians viewpoints are going to be informed by whatever religion they practice (if they practice at all). That's true of all of us. But the decisions that lawmakers make as a whole have to reflect the will of the people, not of a segment of the people who happen to give a lot of money to campaigns and who have a bully pulpit to propagate their viewpoint. I see just that happening with the current presidential administration, as well as many (not all) of the
Republicans in office. That frustrates me.

Now, having said that, I do intend to vote for the Republican candidate for governor in Louisiana, Bobby Jindal, because I think he is the best candidate for the job, and has the interests of the state at heart.

And this is why I don't write about politics and religion.

Tomorrow (or soon, at any rate) I will write about Harry Potter. There's a harmless topic.

Ha!

My Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom is: Lord Voldemort kills Voldemort whilst running away from a rampaging flock of gerbils Get your Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom

OK, I have to admit this one is pretty funny, too.

Hee!

My Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom is: Nearly Headless Nick gets pregnant by Harry with a wicked cackle Get your Harry Potter Spoiler of Doom

This is a plot point I would pay good money to read!

And Let Me Just Say...

Roger Federer is one attractive man. And a snappy dresser. Glad he won today.

I had the most bizarre dream this morning, and I thought I'd share it with all you good people.

So I dreamed that I was at an open house for the Sisters of Charity, the religious order St. Elizabeth Ann Seton founded. Now, this wasn't a vocations thing, as I was the youngest person there by about 30 years, and there were men there, too. All of the sisters were wearing typical "nun clothes" (not a habit, but the kind of things nuns typically wear), but they all had on bonnets like the one St. Elizabeth is wearing here. And just so you know, I wrote a paper about St. Elizabeth and the Sisters of Charity in college (for the worst class I ever had in any level of education), which is how my subconscious supplied all these details.

Anyway, I got there too late to listen to this really great speaker I wanted to hear (which is my subconscious's way of spanking me for having trouble making it to church on time on a weekly basis). So those of us who arrived late were entertained by two lovely, elderly nuns who shared with us stories about the order's lay volunteer program (I don't even know that they have one of these, but a lot of orders do).

When the speaker in the other room was finished (to loud applause, and the listeners leaving with tears in their eyes), we were all shuttled to another room to have dinner and watch a movie, I'm not sure what dinner consisted of beyond noodles - and there were a LOT of noodles, including ramen), but the movie was about the man who was Pope before John XXIII. I don't think that he was ever named (which is my subconscious's way of saying that I have no idea who was Pope right before John XXIII), but he was played by Kenneth Branagh. It was quite an interesting film. In my mind, apparently this Pope was in ill health and did not want the faithful to know. So he devised all these "helps" to help him stand upright and walk easily whenever he had to be in public. It was quite the good movie, and Kenneth Branagh was brilliant.

When the movie was over, the sisters collected our dinner dishes (including the styrofoam cups from the ramen noodles), and told us we could do the dishes later. Then one of the sisters pulled out a guitar to lead a sing-along. That, thankfully, is when I woke up.

The dream was vivid enough that I had to look up on IMDB whether or not Kenneth Branagh played a pope in a move that was released in 2005. He did not. I also had to look up and see who was Pope before John XXIII. Branagh looks nothing like him. I also thought that there was another guy between Pius XII and John XXIII. Guess not, huh?

Anybody want to analyze this?

Oh, and I watched Finding Neverland yesterday. I've had the DVD for over a year and never quite got around to watching it. Wonderful movie. I also watched Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. Not quite as wonderful, but entertaining nonetheless.

I think I may be sick. I woke up with really bad stomach pains that haven't gone completely away. I'm at work, nonetheless, though. Could be I'm just about to embark on that time of the month. (Sorry, guys).

Oh, and the AC isn't working in my building, apparently. Which makes being stuck here even more miserable. Yee. Hah.

So I think I'm in love.

Who is the lucky guy you may be asking yourself (if you really have no life whatsoever).

That would be Gordon Ramsay.

Yeah, the foul-mouthed chef guy.

I've been watching Hell's Kitchen on Fox for the last three years - love it. It's (sadly) my favorite part of the summer. This season totally rocks, too, because the contestants are sooo annoying.

Today, because things are slow (my job is very much a hurry-up-and-wait kind of job - it's either dead slow or crazy rushed), I watched a bunch of Gordon Ramsay stuff on YouTube. Kitchen Nightmares is wonderful. Even better were videos of him cooking stuff. His food is so simple, but looks so good.

I can't wait for the US version of Kitchen Nightmares this fall. And if I ever make it to England, I think I shall have to save for months to be able to eat in one of his restaurants, because I think it will be worth it.

That is all.

Sigh. I've said it before and I'll say it again - my church really needs to move services to 11:05 instead of 11. I was a minute late again today, and as a result, I didn't go. Something from my childhood prevents me from going into church anythig less than right-on-time. If I were still doing the therapy thing, I might look at that. But I'm not so I won't - at least right now.

I miss my computer. I hope it gets fixed soon. My old computer is annoying me. I didn't realize just how slow my old computer is. That is why I am typing this at the office. Well, that and the fact the company pays for the air conditioning here, as opposed to me paying at home. It's another blistering day.

So, here are my final thoughts on the reunion weekend.

TG made an interesting point about being a different person, but retaining...something...that made her still recognizable. That was pretty much my reaction, too.

See, there is no doubt that I am a different person than I was 13 years ago. Lot's of life experience plays into that. I faced the death of my last parent, being on the verge of being homeless (I never wrote about that, and don't know that I ever will), had jobs and lost jobs, had my faith challenged, and moved half a country away. And that's just the big stuff.

I'm not even the same person I was when I moved five years ago. My years at the CCC (well, year and a half) had a profound affect on me, as I faced for the economic discrimination for the first time. Not to mention my time at my former company, where I thought I had a real career but was just kidding myself.

I've grown more liberal, more outgoing (honest, I have!), and more...something I don't have a word for.

I think that's where a lot of my anxiety over that weekend came from. I stressed over what people would think of me as I am now. But you know, that was a waste of energy. Even though everyone was different, they were simultaneously the same. And I was, too.

I think that's a pretty remarkable thing. No matter the distance, no matter the circumstances, no matter the changes, something always remains constant. That's pretty amazing to me. God truly does good work.

I mentioned before that I don't think I could live in Pittsburgh again. On further reflection, I stand by that. It is still a great city, and I still think I'm going back in the fall. But something felt...unlivable about it - ironic for America's Most Livable City. I don't know that I can define what exactly it was that made it feel that way. Perhaps it's just the haze of memory that hover's over the city where I spent most of my life. Some of it is good stuff, but a lot of it is bad. It's the place where I learned alot of those negative thinking patterns that led to anxiety and depression. I learned to put my needs behind the needs of everyone else, to an unhealthy extreme. I learned that what is an acceptable level of achievement for other people isn't good enough for me. And I learned that my only real value to people was as something to be used when needed, acknowledged when convenient, and ignored otherwise.

I didn't realize that all that stuff was lurking below the surface until I went back there as a tourist. But it is, and for me to be a relatively well-adjusted adult, I don't think I can be someplace where I can encounter those things just around any corner. That is what I meant when I said I feel like I've outgrown the city.

I'm glad that we are planning to make the reunion weekend an annual thing. I lost touch with so many people after college, partially because I had other things to deal with (my mother's decline and death, mostly), and partially because it was such a pain to write a paper letter or so expensive to make a long-distance phone call. And partially, too, because I tend to give up if I write to or call someone a couple times in a row and they don't reply back (not that that applies to anyone in this group - that's more of a high school thing). I hope we can all stay in better touch now. Despite what I said above, I miss those ties to my former life.

I haven't written my long reflection, because my computer went kablooey, and is now on its way back to Dell to be fixed. No idea what happend - it just stopped working.

 

And of course, I don't have back ups of the files (except for the Greater American Novel - thank you Google Docs!) on the hard drive, including all the pictures I took last weekend. I had planned to back them up the night the computer died.

 

Sigh.

 

I shall have time for some writing this weekend, barring any more unforeseen circumstances.

My full reflections on the weekend that was will be coming tomorrow. I needed today to recover from the trip (which could have been just one day longer).

Instead, I will say that I think I'm planning on going back in October to do stuff I didn't have time to do this weekend.

Oh, and if any of you non-bloggers among us have a reflection on the weekend you would like to share, feel free to send it on and I will post it.

Finally, I leave you with something to ponder. Louisiana just sent all of its residents a booklet about avian flu. It says to watch your chickens for signs of infection. Among signs of infection in chickens are coughing, sneezing, and diarrhea. My question on all of those is: how can you tell?



Yes, I am a city girl. My dad (who lived on a chicken farm for a while) would be appalled.

So I'm in the airport in Pittsburgh. My flight doesn't leave until 4:55, and it's only 1:38. What better way to kill some time than to bore all of you good people to death?

Here are some thoughts on my first trip north in 5 years, and my first trip to my alma mater since graduation (that would be...13 years. It makes me a little nauseated every time I say or think that).

• It was so good to see so many people I'd lost touch with. I'm hoping that doesn't happen again.


• It was also very weird to see all of them with kids. Even though I knew they had them, as most people my age do, it was still weird. I guess since I don't have any of my own, it doesn't dawn on my that other people do. They were all great kids, though.


• If I were forced to move back to Pennsylvania, I think I could live in Erie, but I'm not so sure about Pittsburgh. That's really weird, because if you had asked me when I was in college if I would ever leave Pittsburgh, the answer would have been a resounding no. And I was absolutely certain I would never leave Pennsylvania. Funny how life works out.


• When thinking about the above, I think the reason I could live in Erie and not in Pittsburgh is the fact that Erie holds almost all good memories for me, but Pittsburgh - not so much. I became my own person in Erie. I discovered facets of myself and things within myself that I never thought existed. Really, more than anything else other than my parents, Gannon formed me into who I am today. Mostly for the good.


• I wish I would have had more time today to walk around campus and see the changes. It looks a little more like a typical campus now.


• I was very serious about how much Erie reminds me of Baton Rouge. As I was driving along Peach Street yesterday, I kept calling it Airline Highway in my head. I need to ruminate more on this.


• I went to Eat'n Park for dinner last night. I had Potato Soup, which is still wonderful. I also had Rosemary Chicken which...not so much. It was bland, and the sauce had a kind of sweet flavor. The Grilled Stickies I had for dessert made up for it, though.


• Next time I do this trip, I'd kinda like to take a whole week, and I'd kinda like to drive the whole way. I like driving, and I like seeing the country.


• The one less-than-bright spot on this trip was the lunch I had with a friend on Friday. I'm not going to talk about it now, but suffice it to say, she was less than happy about where I am right now faith-wise, and she let me know it. That surprised me, because she is usually pretty open-minded and liberal. The other person who was with us was also unhappy, but I've known that for ages now. He stopped e-mailing me over my decision to become Lutheran, in fact. It shocked me that he even came to lunch (I didn't know he was going to until I got there), but I guess it was just to put in his two cents about how I was going to burn in Hell forever. I reminded him that his favorite liturgical composer (Marty Haugen) is on my team and asked him if he was going to stop using his music because he was a heretic (the guy is a liturgist). He didn't answer. I'll write more about this later.


• I have lots more to say about all this, and will probably have blog fodder for a while. In the mean time, here is some picture from this weekend - Probably Pittsburgh.

So I'm sitting here in a McDonald's parking lot in Erie listening to seagulls. No wireless connection at the Motel 6.

I had forgotten how similar Erie and Baton Rouge are. I knew it on one level - both college towns, both with water as a major feature, both outgrew their infrastructure before they were ready.

But the feel of the two cities is really similar. Baton Rouge is a little bigger, and a lot warmer, but similar nonetheless.

When I get home tomorrow (or more likely on Tuesday) I'll have a longer entry about this whole experience. For now, I leave you with a picture of a Lake Erie sunset. I took about 75 of them last night, so I might as well share one...

Here is what is wrong with Pittsburgh. Tonight, there was a gallery crawl downton. I drove through and had no idea what was going on. I just found out from a blog. There was no mention in the local paper. I would have liked to have gone to that. But since I didn't know it was going on, I didn't.

 

There are other things wrong, but I may write about them later.

If I can find a wireless connection in Erie, I'll provide you a bigger update on today. I didn't do much of anything today - I was sore. I did drive all over the city, and I took a few pictures.

I'm still processing the whole returning home thing. I think I needed this trip for closure more than anything else. I'm happy in Baton Rouge, happier than I can ever remember being, in fact (well, except maybe for my college days before my dad died). I'm financially stable, I have a job that I really like, and I'm generally speaking content.

I'll say more tomorrow. The connection I have right now is iffy at best. I've lost it about 5 times over the course of this post.