Saturday, June 10, 2006

Pondering

So I've had a little more time to process Boss Lady's resignation. And I still don't know what to make of it.

I mean, it's her life, and I'm sure that she is making the right decision for her and her family. But this whole thing feels...weird. I guess part if it is because no one ever thought that BL would resign from this company. She has been amazingly faithful. The company hasn't been faithful to her, however. Less qualified people have been promoted over her, but she has been given more and more projects and responsibility. I can understand the factors that went into her decisions, and I respect her for it.

However, I can't understand why she won't speak to me anymore. Oh, she'll yell at me for things I can't control, or because I misunderstood something she told me to do, but she won't simply be...cordial with me like she still does with everyone else. I don't know what I might have done to piss her off so mightily.

And then, something else must have happened in the last two weeks. When she did my review two weeks ago, we were talking about improving my training in a particular application we use, teaching me to document for audit, and a bunch of other things. She even said that she'd be interested in the same graduate program I'm looking at, and suggested that we start together.

I just don't understand this, and I'm bothered by things I don't understand.

On the other hand, the vendor that I mentioned in my last post all but offered me a job if things don't go well next week. Of course, it would most likely mean moving to Chicago. He asked me how I felt about Chicago when I was talking with him and my response was, "Well, they have a nice bus station." Then I told him I didn't know if I could afford to live in Chicago and he said that there are a lot of affordable neighborhoods.

It would be nice to be able to live somewhere where I can use public transportation again. And it would be nice to have more seasons than warm, hot, really hot, and hell (which we are currently entering - it may hit 100 today).

Of course, it would also mean snow. And cold. And ice.

But I'd get to do training and computer support, which I do like.

But...

But...

But...

Sigh. It's a lot to think about. And I may be reacting for nothing. I just don't know.

Sigh.

2 comments:

tomzgrrl said...

Good luck in all of your upcoming trials and decision making.

I like Chicago. There would definitely be a lot of opportunities there, eductionally. Art and culture-wise. Fabulous food.

Of course, you'll freeze your butt off for a few months every year. But, those of us up here on the Great Lakes have learned to adapt!

Sheryl said...

I actually miss the cold. especially in the summer (we don't drop below 90 from June until late October).

And I like the idea of Chicago. I don't know how I feel about it in reality, though.

But it could be I don't have to worry about it.

Or maybe I really need to worry about it.

I just don't like uncertainty.