OK. I was going to regale you with tales of my trip to Wal-Mart last night, which I'm sure would have entertained you.

But instead, I'm going to have a little meltdown for the whole internet to see.

Last week, I had a proposal due. It had to be shipped by 7 p.m. on Tuesday. Tuesday afternoon, parts of it were still being written, and I kept getting changes to stuff I already edited. Plus, I was still getting new graphics to insert. Now this wouldn't be a big deal, but the technical lead on the proposal is a non-native English speaker. Now, he is an extremely smart guy, and pretty well-spoken, but his written English is...interesting. He doesn't use articles, for instance. Ever. And he tries to turn every sentence into a compound/complex sentence.

Now, if I had had more time, this wouldn't be a problem. But I literally spent 36 hours straight editing it between Monday morning and Tuesday when we shipped. I worked all day Saturday on it, and I didn't even make it to church on Sunday (Easter) because I was just too tired (I had put in about 50 hours the week prior as well) and I had to go into the office anyway. I poured my heart and soul into that proposal. It isn't my fault that the technical lead didn't agree witht he schedule I proposed for writing and reviews, knowing that there was a holiday in there and knowing that there would be a ton of editing involved on my end. I did everything I could to convince him. After the first review, 5 days before it was due, almost the whole thing had to be rewritten. We got it off in time, though, and it wasn't too horrible.

Well, after sleeping the sleep of the dead for 16 hours, I came into work the next day. I had an e-mail from the technical lead. Some of the cross references to captions on graphics came back with error messages. Now, I had someone double check me the night before to make sure there was nothing like that in the proposal - I was so tired that I didn't trust myself at that point. He didn't find anything, so we printed and shipped. I have no idea where the error messages came from. If I inserted new graphics, the cross reference should have automatically updated. Frankly, it was only two cross references, and it really shouldn't be that big of a deal.

Well, today the boss says to me right before he leaves that sometime when we both have a few minutes tomorrow, he wants to talk to me a little about the proposal. I asked him if I did something wrong, and he said it was no big deal.

Now, I know I should take that at face value, but I am currently in a state of controlled panic. I really wish, even if I had screwed the whole thing up, that he would have just grabbed me tomorrow and reamed me out with no notice. Instead, I have all night to worry about it.

That is a really cruel thing to do to someone with an anxiety disorder, I have to say. Of course, he doesn't know that I have an anxiety disorder, and that the little voice in my head that tells me I'm just a complete screw-up just got activated. He doesn't know that I am currently scared to death that I'm not going to have a job after tomorrow.

Sigh. Maybe going off the anxiety meds is a bad idea.

Oh, and if you love me, you'll send me chocolate!

Yes, I am craving it like mad.

On to happier things.

My favorite show on the radio is Hootenanny Power. What is, Hootenany Power, you ask? And how did they get radio capability into the backwoods to broadcast it?

That second question was on I asked when I first heard of the show. Then I finally heard the show itself, and was impressed.

Hootenany Power (yes, I am enjoying typing that phrase) is a show produced by our local NPR station. It plays...well, their playlist is really hard to describe. In any given week, they might play "classic" folk music, early rockabilly, Gospel, country, Cajun, and something the host found on some coffeehouse musician's website. It is really eclectic, fun, and totally unlike anything you would hear anywhere else.

The link above takes you to the show's website (which is kind of hard to navigate), and near the top is a link that takes you to the WRKF podcast of the show. I highly recommend the show from April 7th. The theme that night was (obviously) Easter, and the host had a lot of really interesting songs that night.

Oh, and I know there are a few clergy members or other full-time church types who read this blog. What would you do if a parishoner brought such a letter to your attention? Just curious...

First, thanks for the well wishes, Tim. It took over an hour, but I eventually did stop bleeding (after staining a t-shirt - the first white thing I could grab - completely red). Now, you can barely see the cut (though the skin does split without being held together with a bandaid).


OK.


I should be working on a proposal that is due tomorrow. And, as this is the Joyful Easter Season (tm) I should be ponficating on the Grace Jesus's death and ressurection bestowed upon all of us. I should at least be telling all of you to download Hootenany Power's podcast from this past week, which was awesome. Or perhaps I should be telling you what Hootenany Power is.

Instead, I shall rant about politics and Church.

You have been warned.

This past week, I received a letter from a parishioner at St. Al's CCC (Church and Country Club, for the unitiated). Now, even though I don't consider myself Roman Catholic any more, I'm still on their rolls. I don't know why I haven't asked to be taken off, but I haven't. But that's a topic for another time.

Anyhow, this parishoner is running for state representative in our district. In the letter, he states something along the lines of "As a fellow parishoner of [insert actual parish name here], I'm sure you must be concerned about the same issues I am." He goes on to talk about things that have been said in sermons in recent weeks, and just generally talk about the fact that we should all vote for him because he is a good Catholic.

This is the second such letter I have gotten in the past few months. The first was from some woman running for judge (and I have a whole 'nother rant in me about why judge should not be an elected office, but I won't inflict that on you tonight).

Now, both of these people are good people. I know them and their families. They would probably be good in the respective positions they desire, despite the fact that they are Republicans. However, I didn't vote for the woman running for judge, and I won't vote for this guy.

I have a real issue with someone sending out election materials based on religious parish rolls (as opposed to civil parish - I live in Louisiana, so I need to make that distinction). Whether they handtyped the data from the parish directory, or received it electronically from the church office, it is wrong.

I am a firm believer in separation of church and state. I believe the state should keep it's nose out of what churches are doing (as long as they are not harming people, animals, etc., or breaking civil law), and churches should keep their noses out of politics.

Now that doesn't mean that religious leaders shouldn't speak out against things like discrimination, poverty, etc. Those are human rights issues, and all people (religious or not) have a moral obligation to speak out agaist them.

But it does mean that I don't want this country turned into a theocracy controlled by the religious right. I read to day that the Bush administration employs over 155 graduates of Regent University School of Law. That is the law school founded by Pat Robertson, with a stated intent of Christianizing the country.

And it does mean that I don't want people to assume they know what I think or that they will have my vote just because we belong to the same church. I know that the guy I just got the letter from is about as far to the right as a Catholic can be. I am pretty darned far to the left. He doesn't know that I agree with him on issues that face the state such as abortion, discrimination based on sexual orientation (which is a big issue in state government here - it is technically still legal), the death penalty, stem cell research (LSU has lots of biomedical research going on), or even taxation.

Now, that doesn't mean that people of faith who serve in public office need to compartmentalize themselves, either. Spirituality (Christian or otherwise) is a vital part of the make up of an individual. Of course your religion is going to impact your views, as is your age, marital status, whether or not you are a parent, your economic bracket, etc.

But tell me what you are going to do to make our state a better place. Tell me what you think we should do to quicken rebuilding in New Orleans, or improve the infrastructure in Baton Rouge, or improve the pitiful state of our public schools statewide.

Don't tell me that I should vote for you simply because we share a religion and a church. That is a surefire way to tick me off and to get me to not vote for you.

There was more to this rant, but my brain is fried from working on this damned proposal all weekend.

So I now return you to your regularly scheduled, boring, non-controversial blog.

Have a nice day.

You know how I said that I usually use scissors when I cook because I can't be trusted with knives?

Sigh.

I was chopping carrots for beef stew tomorrow (odd choice for Easter, I know. But I don't like ham and I have to work tomorrow). My finger got too close to the knife, and I put a nice little slice through it. It isn't bad enough to go to the ER, but bad enough that it won't stop bleeding. The urgent care doesn't open until 9 a.m. tomorrow.

This is why I should never cook.

Oh, Happy Easter!

This is one of the saddest things I have read in a long time.

I have a long and involved rant planned about the state of child welfare and education in the United States. I don't have time to type it now because I'm working on deadline (I'm in the hurry-up-and-wait phase of proposal development right now). But stay tuned, because I will be getting as political and controversial as I am likely to get. You won't want to miss that.

Retraction

My apologies to LeBron James. TG informs me he does in fact have a child, with one on the way.

But he still doesn't need a house that is 78 times larger than my apartment (which means it is the size of my entire building, minus one floor).

Oh, and the NBA should not give teenagers multi-million dollar contracts. Heck, I would have trouble managing that, and I'm in my 30's. I can't even imagine the mess I would have made and the trouble I would have gotten into at 19.

And the NBA needs to stop treating the colleges as a minor-league system. Kids go to college for one or two years, leave with the minimum number of credits they can, and make millions of dollars with no ability to manage it. Meanwhile, they are taking up scholarship money that should be used by students who are actually interested in getting an education.

I'm sorry. I really, really hate the NBA. And the NBA is making me hate college basketball, too.

Not that the NFL is all that much better, but at least there aren't many football players who start as freshmen.

Give me hockey and baseball. With well-developed minor league systems, kids who really don't want to go to college and just want to play ball do just that. The ones who opt for college are actually interested in being there.

But Just So You Don't Think I'm Biased...

...these guys deserve a pat on the back.

And Let Me Just Say...

...LeBron James needs to be smacked upside the head. This "home" he is building is 78 times larger than my apartment. What does a 20 year old, with no children and no wife, who is on the road over half the year, need with a house that big? Come to think of it, what does anyone need with a house that big?

I hate professional basketball.

I plan to write more about what prompted the insane little dash down memory lane in my last post later.

But for now, can I just say that the whole thing with Bindi Irwin has just creeped me out? Her father died tragically and unexpectedly, and she's delivering a eulogy without tears at the funeral? And ever since she's been on this media swing where she's been all peppy and happy. I don't understand it.

When my dad died, prosaically and expectedly, I had planned to speak at his funeral. But when the time came, there was no way I could do it. I was totally non-functional. And I didn't recover from that easily. In fact, I still don't know if I am recovered (although I was able to make a joke yesterday about the fact that he died on April 15th, income tax day here in the US).

If it is her mother pushing her into this, then she ought to be ashamed. If this is really how the child has been, well, then I worry about what the fallout will be when reality sinks in.

Oh, and the media themselves should be ashamed as well, for all the play this eight year old has gotten.

If you ever want to feel better about yourself, find your high school's alumni group on MySpace. See how many people are really still just fatter, drunker adolescents. Realize that you were one of the few who had the courage to actually get out of Sheraden and move on with your life. Realize that you are one of the few who finished college in a normal amount of time. Realize that a lot of people don't seem to have grasped the concept that 35 is a whole lot different than 18.

Then smile about how well you are doing, all things considered.

Then cry that so many people are still in that place.

I Also Wanted to Say...

We sang "Lift High the Cross" in church yesterday (yes, I made it for a change - I had to take the world's fastest shower to do it, but I made it).

These are the lyrics that we sang. Now, we sang this in the Catholic Church, too, but with different lyrics. I never realized how...martial this hymn was.

I admit, I don't like hymns that use military imagery to begin with. But I was struck by the dichotomy in this one this week. The same hymn that exhorts Christians with "the love of Christ proclaim" talks about "the hosts of God/in conquering ranks combine." I have issues with that.

But beyond the fact that it seems to suggest that Christians should go on a no-holds-barred attempt to convert the world, this is one of my favorite hymns.

OK. Really, I just like the music and the refrain.

OK. Just the music.

Sigh.

There is a new Anne Lamott book! Guess what I'm getting myself for...April Fools Day!

The guy who played Larry "Bud" Melman on David Letterman died yesterday. I heard either on TV or on the radio that he had no family, so Letterman announced his death.

That is my biggest fear. Not that Letterman will announce my death, but that I will die with no one left behind and that no one will care or notice that I am gone.

Heavy thoughts for 10:30 a.m.

Yes, I know it's been a while since I have said anything substantial. I've been busy, OK? Here are some further thoughts I want to share with you.

• Saint Augustine said a lot of really interesting things. Why did he seem so boring in my theology and philosophy classes?
• I've decided there isn't much I can do about the lack of spritual development and adult education opportunities in my congregation. There is the Adult Forum, but that is at 9:30 a.m. on Sunday. If I physically can't get up to make it to 11 a.m. services, there is no way I can do that. There is also a book study on Tuesday evenings, but I can't commit to anything then, as so many proposals we work on have a Wednesday due date. And we are such a small and highly scattered congregation (about 300 members (175 active) and a radius of about 30 miles) that more "stuff" is a difficult thing to contemplate. So, if spiritual growth won't come to Sheryl, Sheryl will go to spiritual growth. Or something like that. An Episcopal church and a Methodist church in the area are combining to conduct a workshop on Taize prayer next week (If you click the link, ignore the first thing in the article - I have no idea what spiritual molestation is, and I'm pretty sure I don't want to know). I'm registering for it because I've always appreciated Taize, and I may gain some knowledge I can bring back to my congregation.
• My bracket for the NCAA tournament is totally screwed up, though my final four is still alive.
• I've decided that an anonymous benefactor is going to give me a million dollars (Of course I don't know who - he or she wouldn't be anonymous then would he or she?). I am then going to buy either an overpriced condo or an overpriced cottage in a retirement community, a really cool car, and a dog with floppy ears who I will name Harvey, Jr. Then Harvey and I will travel around the country writing about all the colorful people and things we encounter. I will be declared the Jack Kerouac of my generation, and then I will go live in my condo or retirement community with my faithful Harvey Jr. by my side. It's good to have a plan, no?
• Sonic's Vanilla Coke is a gift from God.
• As is dried pineapple from Whole Foods.
• Oh, and any vanilla ice cream.
• I had a very productive day today. I bought new car insurance (don't tell LADOTD, but I've been without it for a while), opened a new bank account (Money Market account for my student loan, that has no minimum balance and no fees and 5% interest rate), picked up a prescription, and wrote a note to someone that I'm not ready to talk about yet. Oh, and I did some work, too.
• I'm waiting to decide that I can go on vacation until I know for sure if I need to have surgery this summer (should know in April). But I really, really want to book it now and know that I can go away. I need to take time that is my own and reconnect with the part of myself that is still there, just floating around in the stratosphere lately. I've told y'all before that I'm planning to go to Holden Village and I still am. I think I've figured out how to finagle all the expenses that I'll be able to manage it.
• The only things I miss about cable are Comedy Central, TV Land, Animal Planet, and the Food Network. I think cable companies should have a way that you can only purchase the channels you want, and you bill is prorated for those channels.
• I shall share more stuff later this week, perhaps.

So, here are some of my random thoughts. I know you have been waiting for these with bated breath.

• I've said it before, but my church really needs to move the late service to 11:30. I would never miss a service if they did. Or, they need to implement my other idea. The other ELCA church in my city and my church need to get together and plan a Sunday evening service. The pastors could alternate week-by-week so neither of them would get stuck week after week. They could preach the same sermon they used on Sunday morning, and an LSU music student could handle the music (they like the experience of playing and singing traditional hymns). Dude, that would be perfect.
• Russel Stover Vanilla Creme Eggs are love.
• I hit an earthmover this weekend. It was his fault for not leaving me room to back out.
• I saw Zodiac this weekend. It was quite good, but it was the kind movie you had to think through. Oh, and there should be a law that you have to check your cell phones at the door of the theater if you can't control yourself.
• In yet another way the universe should conform to meet my needs, the St Patrick's Day Parade needs to start at 11 a.m. instead of 9 a.m. That is too early to get up and too early to drink at the company party.
• Oh, and the Pirates and Astros should play one series every year in Louisiana so I don't have to drive 5 hours just to see a big-league game.
• Plus, I would know before the end of April if I have to have surgery this summer so I can make vacation plans.
• I have something else floating around in my head, but I don't remember what it was. I shall have to share later.

OK. Amazon sent me this link which is supposedly the 200 definitive albums of the Rock era. I agree with some of their choices, but the Titanic Soundtrack? 50 Cent's first album? R. Kelly? And there was no Queen listed, I don't remember seeing REM (though I could be wrong). What's up with this list? Discuss.

Not a Big Surprise...

I always said I was just slightly to the left of center - this just confirms it. The war thing is totally off, though...

Neo-Liberal You scored 53% Personal Liberty and 31% Economic Liberty!

A neo-liberal believes in moderate government intervention on personal matters and moderate to high government intervention on economic matters. They believe in a social safety net or welfare state and try to balance personal liberty with safety or security. Some neo-liberals believe in more foreign intervention or war then most other leftists. Others are more like Centrist Democrats. More authoritarian-leaning Neo-liberals (such as personal 40/economic 30) are the result of a "fusion" between "old left" and "new right" tendencies.

My test tracked 2 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 99% on Personal You scored higher than 99% on Economic

Link: The Politics Test written by brainpolice on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test

Hello, faithful readers. At the end of this very long week, I have worked about 75 hours, including the past 24 straight. It has ben an adventure, to say the least. Now, as soon as my boss gets back, I am going to leave and get something to eat. Then I'm going to try to find a way to stay up until at least 6 tonight. If I fall asleep before that, I'm afraid I'll wake up at 11 and not be able to get back to sleep.

Perhaps tomorrow I will have the time and the energy to write something substantial. Or perhaps not. The world may never know.